More Like a Visitor

In time it was more like he visited on the weekends. I felt more relaxed during the week. It was almost as if I knew he would just show up Thursday or Friday night and be gone again by Sunday afternoon. It didn't always work out that way but it happened that way more often than not. Sometimes he was even gone by Friday or Saturday evening. I prayed for short and uneventful weekends.

These weeks were still marred by the uncertainty. Everyone kept on guard knowing he could pop in at any time.We were good at warning each other. While he was there we never knew if he would freak out or be almost pleasant. Not kidding about the pleasant part. I suspect he had a kinky girlfriend or two. We didn't know what kind of pain he might cause inflict. Sometimes it was emotional pain but I sometimes wonder if emotional pain wasn't the worst kind since a bruise would heal more quickly.

We all had routines for when he was back. We stayed in our rooms or went to friends houses to hide, I mean hang out. I made sure I did my chores and anything else that needed to be done to avoid his wrath, to be seen as busy and maybe in a good light. He had a way of picking at how we were doing things. He would say, "That's the wrong way to do it" or "you could be doing a better job if..." The worst part would be if there was something that needed to be done and we were hiding out instead. Then we were all in for it.

Our lives at this point for the most part were separate but connected in a way that was miserable for everyone involved but him. I think he was still getting some kind of sick and twisted pleasure by keeping us all miserable, fearful and sad. Maybe he didn't see the scope of his actions.